[SPORTS] NFL Power Rankings: Week 3

Published on by Chris Osburn

 

 

 

Team TW LW
1 1 The Packers are 3-0, but the other undefeated teams are a little more surprising (Detroit and Buffalo)
2 3 Everyone is talking about Tom Brady, but Drew Brees is averaging 353 yards passing per game.
3 6 Proof that Ryan Fitzpatrick is the MAN: he wore a ninja turtles T-Shirt when he got interviewed by SportsCenter this week.
4 5 ‘Fin Jason Taylor said that Chad Henne is better than Mark Sanchez. That’s to be expected. He probably covers his eyes when his team is on offense like everyone else.
5 2 No shame in losing to the Saints. Keep your chins up and swing harder next time.
6 4 How did Wes Welker get out of Mordor after he threw the ring into the fires of Mount Doom?
7 7 Through 3 weeks, Terrell Suggs is the best defensive player in the NFL. That’s not enough and he wants to play fullback. At this pace, by week eight he’ll also be the quality control coach.
8 10 It’s a rust belt revolution. The Lions look like a legitimate playoff team.
9 9 The Bolts usually have a slow start. Will this be the year they start strong and fizzle out when it matters?
10 12 You can’t make this up: Former ‘Skin Mark Rypien’s daughter is the starting QB for the Seattle Mist of the Lingerie Football League.
11 14 The Raiders proved that they are probably the best team in the AFC West after their convincing win over the Jets.
12 16 Ben Roethlisberger looks more like Shrek every week. He may be stealing the nickname from Former Rockies outfielder Dante Bichette.
13 17 Fingers crossed for creamsicle orange uniforms this week on Monday Night Football against the Colts.
14 8 The New York Post thinks that Michael Vick is LITERALLY a big baby.
15 13 I’ve never heard of Dan Bailey, but apparently he’s the best player on the Cowboys.
16 22 Justin Tuck wrote a book about growing up with 5 sisters. No wonder he grew up to be a great defensive player.  He had to defend himself against all that estrogen as a kid.
17 20 What ever happened to Elvis Grbac?
18 11 Things are going bag for the Falcons. Kicker Matt Bryant had his golf bag stolen by a man who delivered Chinese food to his house.
19 15 If I was announcing a bears game, I would have a hard time not saying Johnny Knoxville instead of Johnny Knox.
20 21 Chris Johnson watch: through 3 games he has 46 rushes for 98 yards. That’s a 2.1 average. Does anyone have LenDale White’s phone number?
21 18 Remember when everyone was saying that Maurice Jones-Drew was done? He should heat up some alphabet soup so they can all eat their words.
22 23 Cardinals QB nickname ‘o the day: Kevin “corn on the” Kolb.
23 27 Don’t even try to stand up while watching the Browns play. It is forbidden. Fear not, there’s usually not much to cheer for anyway.
24 30 Only the Jaguars have scored less points than the ‘Hawks and I’m pretty sure Jacksonville doesn’t even have a team anymore.
25 25 Pro-Tebow billboards popping up all around Denver prove one thing: people in Denver really don’t want the Broncos to win.
26 26 First career win for Cam Newton came in his worst game so far. That’s so Raven.
27 28 The Bungles are officially the worst team in Ohio. Are you happy Mike Brown?
28 19 Almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades and definitely not at Vikings games.
29 29 Reggie Bush, 10 rushes for 13 yards? I could get 13 yards on 10 rushes just by falling forward.
30 24 It must suck for Steven Jackson to wake up every Sunday and realize that he still has to play for the Rams.
31 31 This week’s sign that the apocalypse is upon us: Jeff George wants to come out of retirement to save the Colts.
32 32 Dwayne Bowe wants to blame the lockout for his team’s “slow” start. The Chiefs start is slower than the plot of ‘You’ve got mail’.

 

 

 

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